[Clascomment] OPT-IN:Measurement of the Nucleon Structure Function F2 in the Nuclear Medium and Evaluation of its Moments

[Daniel Carman]

						January 19, 2010


Mikhail,

I have read through the latest draft of your F2 paper. As it looks very
similar to the version that you prepared based on the corrections that 
I sent you back in Nov., I don\'t have too many new comments. Mainly these
are things that I missed last time. Let me know if you have any questions 
or need any clarification.


				      Regards,

				      Daniel

*************************************************************************
Page 1:
 - Line 11. Use \"leading-twist\" and \"carbon-to-deuteron ratio\". 
 - Line 14. Use \"systematic uncertainites\".

Page 2:
 - Line 17. Use \"form-factors\" to be consistent with usage elsewhere.

Page 3:
 - Paragraph 2. Line 2. Use \"... Lab [9], and reporeted ...\".
 - Paragraph 3. Line 1. Use \"Section 3\".

Page 5:
 - Paragraph 3. Line 4. Use \"Drift Chambers\".
 - Paragraph 3. Line 5. Use \"Scintillation Counters\".
 - Paragraph 3. Line 6. Use \"Cherenkov Counters\".
 - Paragraph 3. Line 7. Use \"Electromagnetic Calorimeters\".

Page 7:
 - Paragraph 3. Line 10. Use \"photoelectrons\".


Page 8:
 - Line 1. Use \"... of the contribution was assumed ...\".

Page 10:
 - Paragraph 2. Line 2. Use \"... caused the indicent ...\"
 - Paragraph 2. Line 3. Use \"... of the beam was no longer ...\".
 - Paragraph 2. Line 4. Use \"... FC acceptance. This resulted in ...\".
 - Paragraph 2. Line 6. Use \"Mylar\".
 - Paragraph 2. Line 8. Use \"... walls were selected ...\".
 - Line 2 after Eq.9. Use \"... for the target corresponding to a ...
     see Section 3.5).\".

Page 11:
 - Line 2. Use \"$Z$-vertex\" and \"... between the empty and full ...\".
 - Line 6. Use \"... correction for the $E_0 ...\".
 - Paragraph 2. Line 10. Use \"Finally, the ratio ...\".
 - Paragraph 2. Line 11. Use \"... generated events gave a combined ...\".

Page 12:
 - Item (3). Line 9. Use \"... simulations was compared ...\".

Page 14:
 - Line 5. Use \"weighted-average\".
 - Bullet 3. Line 4. Use \"... tail, it was necessary ...\".

Page 15:
 - Line 1. Use \"... to the known uncertainties in the target length ...\".
 - Line 2. Use \"... energy set, $E_0 ...\".
 - Bullet 2. Line 12. Use \"From this comparison, we obtained ...\".
 - Bullet 3. Line 4. Use \"...is kinematics dependent, ...\".

Page 16:
 - Line 8. Use \"This factor, which reduced the ...\".
 - Line 9. Use \"... in the vicinity ... peak, was parametrized as [1- ...\".
 - Line 3 after Eq.15. Use \"... mentioned above and listed in Table ...\".

Page 18:
 - Table 1 caption. Use \"... sets for each of the different sources.\".
 - Paragraph 1. Line 1. Use \"The carbon structure ...\".
 - Paragraph 1. Line 6. Use \"Within each $Q^2$ bin, the world ...\".

Page 20:
 - Line 6 after Eq.18. Use \"... completely described the ...\".

Page 24:
 - Paragraph 3. Line 6. Ref. to MINOS should be [58] right?
 - Paragraph 4. Line 2. Use \"...considered, therefore adding ...\".
 - Paragraph 5. Line 1. Use \"... in Table 3, we report ...\".

Page 29:
 - Line 2 from bottom. Use \"carbon-to-deuteron\".

Page 30:
 - Line 2. Use \"leading-twist\".
 - Just before Eq.20. Use \"... by:\".
 - Last paragraph. Line 1. Use \"... deuteron moments, but for ...\".
 - Last paragraph. Line 2. Use \"... GeV/c)$^2$, is shown ...\".
 - Last paragraph. Line 11. Use \"... deuteron. A hint of this ...\".

Page 31:
 - Paragraph 2. Line 7. Use \"... picture is the basis for the MIT bag ...\".

Page 32:
 - Fig. 13 caption. Line 1. Use \"The carbon-to-deuteron ratio of the 
    higher-twist moments ...\".

Page 33:
 - Line 5. Use \"... in the carbon-to-deuteron ratio ...\".
 - Line 7. Use \"... in DIS.\".
 - Line 8. Use \"carbon-to-deuteron ratio\".

Page 34:
 - Line 1. Use \"... behavior, increasing almost ...\".
 - Paragraph 2. Line 3. Use \"12-GeV\".
 - Paragraph 2. Line 4. Use \"... [72], while the second ...\".
 - Paragraph 3. Line 3. Use \"... of Energy, the National Science ...\".
 - Paragraph 3. Last sentence. Use proper acknowledgement, JSA or SURA, and
    the correct tense (operates or operated).

Refs:
 - [16] Add space after \"et al.\".
 - [38] separate authors with \"and\" not a comma.
 - [40] No comma after Mecking.
 - [50] Need first initials of authors of second paper in list.
 - [55] I do not believe this link exists any more.