[jlab-9hgl 00416] golf quotes

[machie]

        Golf
        *These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball
        and hit it with the shadow.
        ~ Sam Snead**

        **I was three over. One over a house, one over a patio, and one
        over a swimming pool.
        ~ George Brett**


        **The only sure rule in golf is - he who has the fastest cart
        never has to play the bad lie..
        ~ Mickey Mantle**

        **Sex and golf are the two things you can enjoy even if you're
        not good at them
        ~ Kevin Costner**

        **I don't fear death, but I sure don't like those three-footers
        for par..
        ~ Chi Chi Rodriguez**

        **After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play
        on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a
        sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye.
        ~ Chi Chi Rodriguez**

        **The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of
        the tree.
        ~ Brian Weis**

        **Swing hard in case you hit it.
        ~ Dan Marino**

        **My favorite shots are the practice swing and the conceded
        putt. The rest can never be mastered.
        ~ Lord Robertson**

        **Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you
        can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
        ~ Jack Benny**

        **There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two
        different games, one played in the air, and the other on the ground.
        ~ Ben Hogan**

        **Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of
        the time, you're the best
        ~ Jack Nicklaus**

        **The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's
        almost a law.
        ~ H G Wells**

        **I never pray on a golf course. Actually, the Lord answers my
        prayers everywhere except on the course.
        ~ Billy Graham**

        **If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's
        recreation. If you work at it, it's golf..
        ~ Bob Hope**

        **While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a
        rake.
        ~ Henny Youngman**

        **If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the
        wrong golf ball..
        ~ Jack Lemmon*
        *
        **You can make a lot of money in this game./Just ask my
        ex-wives./ Both of them are so rich that neither of their
        husbands work.
        ~ Lee Trevino**

        **I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes,
        they'd come up sliced.
        ~ Lee Trevino*




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