[Qweak_transverse_prl_comments] Fwd: [Qweak_bnssa_elastic_ep_authors] Final draft of the elastic ep transverse paper - Comments due by October 17th, 2014

[Buddhini Waidyawansa]

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Katherine Mesick <kamyers at jlab.org>
Date: Wed, Oct 15, 2014 at 9:34 AM
Subject: Re: [Qweak_bnssa_elastic_ep_authors] Final draft of the elastic ep
transverse paper - Comments due by October 17th, 2014
To: buddhini at jlab.org


 Hi Buddhini,

Overall it is much better.  There is still one major issue I have with the
way one of the sentences is written.  Otherwise this is mostly minor
comments and a few suggestions for rephrasing.

I will sort of be available if you have a question about anything; I am
going to be on vacation for the next week.

Katherine

line 53-56:
A light suggestion: change to "The lepton helicity flip amplitudes are
important in the theoretical calculation of the two-photon exchange
corrections..."

More firm suggestions:
"reduce the magnitude" -> "reduce the calculated magnitude" (trying to
stress that this is a calculation)
"corrections on" -> "corrections for"
"aiming to understand" -> "aimed at understanding"

line 57, line 61:
electron-proton

line 73:
"corrections on" -> "corrections for"

line 78:
"have been" -> "has been"
"at the high Q^2" -> "in the high Q^2"

line 79:
dominant -> large?

line 79:
capitalize P in -Polarization (or remove capital P in line 76)

line 84:
Ref 15 (Bernauer) is not a global fit.  They only fit their data.

line 88:
Ref 18 - Please update this reference to CODATA 2010!!! (published in 2012)

line 88:
"Hydrogen lamb shift" -> "hydrogen Lamb shift"

line 89:
move ref 19 to end of line and cite together [19,20]

line 90-92:
"One correction..." I still do not agree with this line, it is misleading.
It is a known correction in extracting the radius from the energy level
measurement, but it DOES NOT ACCOUNT FOR ANY OF THE DISCREPANCY.  It would
be better to say "One correction in extracting the radius from muonic
hydrogen is a TPE term that depends on the proton polarizability.  Although
this is a relatively small correction, its size is $\approx$11\% of the
discrepancy and it has the largest theoretical uncertainty associated with
.... "

also "corrections on muonic hydrogen" -> "corrections for muonic hydrogen"

line 98:
It is enough to say that the TPE calculations depend on the helicity flip
amplitude.  I think it's too much detail for this paper so remove the
sentence "Without account..."

I'd also suggest removing the sentence "The effect on MUSE TPE
corrections..."  and maybe rephrasing the next sentence "The only way to
improve model predictions is through benchmarking experimental observables
against..."

line 137:
from from

line 145:
8 -> eight

line 149:
are you using ^0 or ^{\circ}?

line 167:
parity-violating

line 206:
electron-proton

line 207:
7.9$^{\circ}$

line 221-222:
"However, _the_ blah&blah and blah _models consider_..."

line 223:
where as B. -> whereas the B.



-- 
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Buddhini Waidyawansa
Postdoctoral Fellow
C122,
12000 Jefferson Ave,
Newport News, VA 23602.
TP 757-912-0410
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