[Clascomment] OPT-IN: A comparison of forward and backward pp pair knockout in 3He(e, e'pp)n

[Daniel Carman]

					January 19, 2012


Dear Hovhannes and Larry,

I have read through your most recently SRC paper and include my comments below. 
The paper seems to be in good shape so my list is relatively short and includes
some grammar/style/wording issues that I found in my reading. Let me know if you 
have any questions. Note that the version of the paper that was linked on the
CLAS review website was dated Aug. 5, 2011.

			   Regards,

				  Daniel

********************************************************************
General:
 - You are not consistent in this paper with speed of light units c. Either let
   c=1 everywhere or follow consistent notation throughout.

Page 1:
 Abtract.
  Line 3. Use "... experiments by detecting both ...".
 Left column.
  Line 3. "Nucleons in a SRC are comparatively short distances ..." is not a proper
   statement. Please revisit.

Page 2:
 Left column.
  Paragraph 1.
   Line 5. I suggest a clearer notation for omega. How about "$\omega = E_e - E_{e'}$"?
   Line 12. Use "... two nuclei with $p > 0.275~GeV/c$, and is thus ...".
  Paragraph 2.
   Line 2. I suggest "Existing measurements of ...".
   Line 3. Use "... pp)n$ have looked at events where ...".
   Line 9. Use "These measurements are complicated by the strong ...".
   Line 10. What are "continuum-state interactions"?
 Right column.
  Paragraph 4.
   Here you mention that the EC was used for the electron trigger. Was the CC not used in
   this run period for electron triggering as well?

Page 3:
 Left column.
  Fig. 2 caption.
   Line 7. Use "... the data and the straight line ...".
 Right column.
  Fig. 4 caption.
   Line 2. Missing units on p-slow momentum.
  Paragraph 2.
   Line 4. Here you refer to the diagrammatic calculation by Laget. A reference is needed here.

Page 4:
 Left column.
  Paragraph 3.
   Line 1. I suggest "The theoretical cross sections show in this work have been ...".
  Paragraph 4.
   Line 2. Use "... associated with the ...".
   Line 5. Typo on "MEC".
   Line 10. Use "... the third being a spectator.".
  Paragraph 5.
   Line 4. Use "$s$-wave".
 Right column.
  Paragraph 2.
   Line 4. Use "... $s$-wave, which has ...".
  Paragraph 3.
   Line 5. Use "... is emitted backward relative to the momentum transfer, ...".
  Fig. 6 caption.
   Line 2. Remove comma.
   Line 3. Remove comma.
   Line 5. Use "... the data and the histograms ...". (Typo on "histograms".)

Page 5:
 Left column.
  Paragraph 1.
   Line 2. Use "... are emitted forward.".
   Line 6. Use "$\Delta$".
   Line 9. Use "... emitted forward, they have smaller ...".
 Right column.
  Last paragraph.
   Line 1. Use "... the large kinematic coverage of CLAS ...".

Page 6:
 Left column.
  Paragraph 1.
   Line 4 and 6. Use "$\Delta$".
   Line 8. Use "... emitted backwards, each of these interaction effects is much ... becomes more
    sensitive to ...".
  Paragraph 2. 
   This begins "This indicates that short range ...". I recommend that this sentence be made part 
   of the previous paragraph.
 References.
  Ref. 1 - this is incomplete. Is this a conference proceedings. If so, give the full
   name and the editors.
  Ref. 4 - Update year to 2012.
  Ref. 13 - Should be "B.A. Mecking".