[Hallc_running] Call For Shifts - XEM2 and Deuteron Electro-Disintegration

[tjhague at jlab.org]

Hey you. Yeah. You. Reading this over your morning coffee, contemplating
physics, and longing for the thrill of the shift.

Have you ever wanted to join an exclusive club? Yes? Good. May we now
introduce you to Club XEM2/Deuteron Electro-Disintegration.

What are the benefits of club membership you may ask? Authorship, a sense
of accomplishment, and a blissful 8 hours in the Hall C Counting House.
The counting house has all of the amenities you could dream of in your
shift:
Copious snacks
Under-table heaters
Alarms to keep you awake
Monitors as far as the eye can see
Running water
That one scraggly postdoc who may or may not be feral (please feed)

What does this cost? Just a modest commitment of your time.
5 shifts gets you access to the Deuteron Electro-Disintegration club
12 shifts gets you access to the XEM2 club
15 shifts gets you a multi-club membership (XEM2 and Deuteron
Electro-Disintegration)

But Tyler, I hear you asking, you said this club was exclusive. If anyone
(with the required trainings! (Rad Worker I + Hall C Walkthrough(+ Target
Training for Target Operator))) can do this, what makes it exclusive?

You do. You see, right now the shift schedule is a little empty when you
look past the next few days. This leaves ample opportunity to accommodate
interested parties. But, if you wait the other potential members may take
that spot you had your eye on. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity
that you don't want to miss.

The perks don't end there. You aren't limited to 15 shifts. If you take
beyond this, the perks include:
Further access to the snack table
#GoodVibesOnly
A sticky note you can use as a name tag
Fulfillment from seeing slightly more rested grad students
Bragging rights
Front row tickets to the alarm concert (please no lighters during the
power ballads)
Additional time to study the scraggly (feral?) postdoc

I hope this brochure shows you what an exciting opportunity you have to
join our club. We look forward to welcoming you to another day in
paradise.

~~~Club XEM2 / Deuteron Electro-Disintegration: When you're here, we're
sleeping~~~

To apply for club membership, please follow this link:

Happy Shifting and Welcome to the Club,
Tyler Hague
Hall C RC (Oct. 12-19, 2022)